


Intro + ApocaDICK Please

by TheJoshoraptor



Series: Chris' Undisclosed Desires [4]
Category: Muse (Band)
Genre: Apocalypse, Butts, Crack, Crack Relationships, Gay, Gay Male Character, Gay Panic, Gay Sex, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Multi, mmmmmMMMMMMM, taste good chunky delicious
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-07-21
Updated: 2015-07-21
Packaged: 2018-04-10 09:45:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4387052
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheJoshoraptor/pseuds/TheJoshoraptor
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now that Dom has announced his shock pregnancy, the world has begun to end. How will Muse get through this one?!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Intro + ApocaDICK Please

Dom's heart was racing. Every moment that passed, his chest was beating, getting gradually louder until everyone else in the room with him could hear it. The announcement of his shock pregnancy had left a certain effect on his band-mates around him: Chris immediately decided to call one of his many children on the phone to explain how 'another one' is going to join them, but Matt instantly jumped onto the nearest laptop and went onto the internet. Matt opened up a browser and typed in 'www.thegovernmentarereptilians.com' and looked up a conspiracy theory he read the other day. During this, Dom's heart was still gradually increasing in amplitude; a drum beat slowly building up.

"HERE" screamed Matt as he pointed at the laptop screen.

"I'm on the fucking phone, shut up" Chris' explanation to his child was not going well, mainly because he decided to call up Matt's child instead of one of his own, then started explaining how Dom became pregnant through gay anal sex, which has probably traumatised Bingham Bellamy for years to come.

"What is it, Matt?" Dom chimed in, having to raise his voice over the sound of his own organs working, trying to fake an interest in what Matt had to say.

"There is a prophecy here, which says these exact words."

Matt cleared his throat, drowning out the sighing of his band members.

"It is said, in ye olde prophecy of the pre-showbiz era, that the end comes when the blond beauty drummer boy grows a seed."

"Well that is clearly bullshit Matt, you've been reading too much 1984 again"

Dom was not convinced, and Chris was barely listening- but Matt was sure the world was about to end. Dom decided now would be as good a time as any to go for a piss, as Matt was too busy making a tinfoil hat for himself while Chris got gradually more angry at his son, screaming down the phone that he needs to "get a grip." Matt reached for the nearest window, scrambling over wearing his newly created tinfoil hat and steampunk goggles- drawing open the curtains let light fill the room, Chris let out a hiss as he shielded his eyes. Matt looked out of the window to see what had happened to the world, as he was absolutely certain that it would be falling to pieces.

"Chris."

"Fuck off, Matt, I have to ring child number 3"

"No, Chris. Look."

Chris was too tired post-threesome to argue with Matt, so decided to humour him.

"Right I'm looking, what is-"

"Ah fuck."

Chris' eyes saw what he couldn't believe. The beautiful view of the London skyline was ruined by the flames that swept across the city. Matt was right. It was all coming to an end: Muse has inadvertently caused the end of the world.

The pregnant drummer walked back in from his session in the toilet, only to see the same sight that Chris and Matt were welcomed to.

"Oh boy."

The three looked upon the city as Westminster bridge collapsed, taking down all the vehicles down with it, each chunk of the bridge falling into the River Thames, causing huge splashes taking out boats which were trying to sail to safety. Shadows started appearing on the ground, hundreds, maybe thousands of angelic shadows covered the entire cityscape.

Chris backed away from the window and addressed his fellow band-mates.

"Well, if there's something we need to do now, we should do it. We clearly don't have long."

"Repenting our sins?"

"Salvaging my clothing collection?"

"No gentlemen. Gay anal sex."

"Why didn't we think of that!" Dom and Matt said in unison.

"This is no time for Absolution Matt, Dom, your clothes can wait, because you literally won't need them. We're going to make this the best sex of our lives."

**Author's Note:**

> I said about the Apocalypse thing, I delivered babes.


End file.
